Sunday, January 08, 2012

Envisioning 3012: Future Predictions


Check out the Gen-Yers with their vague sense of entitlement and suave assurance (having been thus led to believe) they’ll found a billion dollar start-up or, if not, at least become (in)famous via youtube or (why not?) Xtube, without working too hard because they’ve all been raised by helicopter parents who hovered over their every move, not letting them out of sight, and if they did manage to make it to the backyard, a liberal application of 70SPF sunscreen shall have without exception (even on cloudy days) been required. 
What could the Gen Y offer us. we the older wiser and better mannered? The natural tendency to characterize succeeding generations as sloppier than our own is itself a perilous mistake, because if you do look around, things are improving and always have – in areas where civilization is permitted to persist.

So let’s look around and imagine – what things are improving, at least in my opinion, and imagine the loftiness subsequent generations, who will no doubt be always maligned and discredited by their elders, may lift us.

Herewith, my predictions for 3012 (feel free to offer your own):
  • Euthanasia will be humane, legal and a popular end-of-life care option.
  • Most illicit drugs will be legal, taxed and responsibly sold – a governmental cash flow, draining drug warlord power, and lessening futile wars on drugs with their inherent bloodshed.
  • A lessening of violence in general, and its acceptance in entertainment. It will be less appalling in 3012 to see two men naked and kissing on-screen than it will be to watch 200 men being gruesomely murdered.
  • Vegetarians will no longer be mocked by meat-eaters as unbearable party poopers. The conscious disconnect between eating meat and slaughtering live animals will be exposed and vegetarian food will taste as good as it is popular.
  • Circumcision will be seen and discouraged for the mutilation it is. 
  • Monogamy will not be seen as an undeniable symbol of fidelity.
  • Organized religion will be, on a large scale, abandoned in favor of individual spirituality.
  • A new fuel source will end dependence on barbaric nations and the rape of the planet’s resources. Back 2 the Future’s garbage alternative, perhaps?
  • Genetic modification of your child to weed out handicaps, disease. And though this tool may be used to weed out red-heads or gays, it will be used just as much to create a red-head or a gay.
  • Death of the circus, but rise of the zoos (traveling zoos?) with the exciting return of the Dodo Bird and the Woolly Mammoth. 
  • The 9-5 work week will be an archaic joke as work is handled remotely, for the most part, and around the 24/7 clock.
  • Less borders, less walls. Nations will be run less like rival football teams, and more like enthusiasts of the same sport.
  • The use of non-biodegradable plastic, especially single-use plastic drink containers and disposable plastic bags for groceries, will be looked upon as insidiously wasteful, crude and sooo last century. Much like today  we watch horrified as Betty Draper, in an episode of Mad Men, non-chalantly shakes out her 1950’s picnic blanket littering all its garbage onto the park’s grass.
  • Gender roles and designations will be more fluid. Colours, pink and blue in particular, will have no sexual assignation. We will think: why did they ever?

What else; what are your predictions? Future doesn’t look all bad, eh? Of course I left out the bad news: We’ll all be dead! 

1 comment:

AJI said...

Mr. Futurist Jesse,

Have you ever heard of the suthors Alvin Toffler or Heidi Toffler?

- - -In the 1970's Alvin Toffler introduced the concept of "Futurism" to the reading public with his 1971 published Future Shock. Subsequently, he and his wife, Heidi,m wrote several other futurist oriented books. He and his ilk are very interesting.

If you haven't already read some of this works, I suggest you try the first one and go on from there.

Making suppositions about the future is fun, isn't it?