Wednesday, October 13, 2010

sucked into the XXX plus-sized pageant!

New York City wishes it had a Honey Pot!  Tampa-adjacent Ybor City is home to the Honey Pot, where last weekend I caught the "Miss gay USA At Large" competition --a beauty pageant for drag queens over 230 pounds!  It was way more than a mouthful! 

After my screening at the Tampa Gay & Lesbian Film Festival, I was taken over and totally taken care of by my new buddy Billy -- to catch all the plus sized action!  Major bewigged bodacious beauties tossed their weight around the club, having given fabric stores their biggest boon to business since Christo and Jeanne-Claude wrapped the Reichstag!
The competition was fierce, and these queens sparkle in galactic proportions!
Contestants came to the Honey Pot from 43 states! 

Let's get this out of the way: My night was almost ruined by a few guys who threatened me with fists and violence because I...did nothing but speak to them.  It got really out of hand, and it's not the first time I've been gay bashed in a gay bar by gay people.  All the self-hate and loathing that comes with growing up in a pilgrim nation is too often taken out on one another and it's ugly.  For the record, this is what ugly looks like: 

And now back to winners!

More sequins than there are in the heavens!
Pinned, taped, and sewed up for the evening gown portion of the pageant.

Scoping the competition backstage!
Gagarazzi!  Lady Ho-Ho?
All the glitter that heaven allows!  And for sale!
A chandelier for your ear?
Posing with Ybor City celebrity....and holding postcard of eventual winner Tahjee Iman.
My buddy Billy (far right) checks out the gorgeous go-go's of the Honey Pot!
I was totally rooting for this ferocious lady! - I caught her talent portion, not only was she being lifted by back up dancers, she did a cartwheel down two stairs and landed in the splits (not in this dress, mind you)!  Despite sticking this landing, she broke one of her heels and continued the rest of her number on the ball of her foot, as if the heel were still there when it wasn't. The showboat must go on!! 
Bracelet latch drama backstage
Latrice Royale texts her fans that she's made the final cut!
And she won best interview.  You go girl! 
Glossing up for the finals!
 Eat your heart out, Divine!

The evening gown portion of the pageant!


These two announcers sat on the sidelines and cracked jokes the whole time, kind of like those two old man Muppets. Except they look like Jayne Mansfield, if she still were alive, and had a twin.
Here's the winner, Miss Tahjee Iman.  The crowd was crazy for her, and she wasn't even the hometown hero!  It was well known (and probably quite obvious the day before during the swimsuit competition) that she has a prosthetic leg!  Which is like, are you kidding me? 
Damn me for missing the swimsuit edition!  When I tried to find out exactly how a lady loses her whole leg, everyone was hush-hush, except one man who told me Miss Tahjee lost her leg after running from the police, tossing herself through a third story window, and landing on a fence below.    

All very dramatic heresay, so when I asked what happened in person she referred me to a site where she (displaying the grace that earned her the Miss Gay USA at large crown) demures, "I lost my leg because I needed to slow down."  No slowing down in Tampa... 

Tahjee takes the cake!
For more on the Miss Gay USA "at large" competition, check the pageantry site.  There is even a Miss USA "classic" for drag queens over 50! Get out and support!

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