Thursday, September 23, 2010

Let me at the Confetti!

Wish I had more time to share stories from the overwhelming inundation of loose ends that must be tied for producing my new web series Half-Share (we shoot next week, yee-haw!) but besides that my lease is up, and we're actually moving.  Half my belongings were on the street last weekend as on our stoop we had a "Stoop-a-Palooza" and screamed things like "Dreams for a dollar!" (we weren't kidding, with a $1 or best offer tag on a fleshjack ("It's only been used once!") but the hottest selling items came from the drag box.  The wigs flew.  Who knew?

I also was asked by my friend Audrey to work the National Texting Championships which is, yes, just as ridiculous as it sounds.  All those kids who can't go a minute without texting their friends some idiotic glob of acronym are being honored, hailed, and....encouraged!?  Competitors younger than Justin Bieber competed to win $100,000 from LG phones.  And you know those fast fingered freaks need that prize money for a college education because you know they can't spell.
Competitors thumbed through various rounds texting difficult phrases (no grammar involved) quickly and accurately in order to advance.  Then they did it blindfolded (I kid you not) and you should have seen the stage mothers stomping, holding their heads like they were about to explode, screaming "technical difficulties!" until it got down to one final winner at which point, the crowd went wild, and then it was my turn.  Pow!  Streamers bury the Roseland Ballroom stage in red and silver. 

Audrey had put me in charge of the C02 cartridge charged STREAMER CANNONS.  Who would put me in charge of the explosives?  She loves me!  I packed my cannon with streamers, screwed in the co2 canister and, trigger happy, prepared to blow my wad upon the winner.

I was standing next to Audrey who was in charge of the confetti machine.  She sees me looking at my cannon, eyes bulging at her big blower confetti machine, moments away from crowning the national texting champion on stage and she says to me, ever so dryly, "Jesse....step away from the confetti."

Which has to be the best admonition ever.  LOL

1 comment:

Audrey said...

You know I love you so much!! Thank you for being so gracious and helping me out - we really needed you!! Rachael is in LOVE with you and CoolDan!! Can't wait to do it again... next time you can do the confetti. ;)