Thursday, January 28, 2010

Anthony Valente (1978-2010)

Most everyone I know is devastated over the loss of Anthony Valente.  It appears my friend died last night, and I don't know much more yet except to say that I'm heartbroken.


Anthony and his partner Xac were always so excited for our Gay Pride theme that each year they hosted a dress-up pre-party for us in their Chelsea salon.  They also hosted many a fundraiser for community charities, and even let us shoot (for free) a scene for Violet Tendencies.

I wish I could go back in time and give him another hug.  Anthony was so quick to hug and so full of life.  His Facebook page now is of course a non-stop flow of memories and goodbyes, and I love what he wrote in the "about me" section:
Take everything you've ever been taught, throw it all away, and discover the truth with an open mind.

A couple of weeks ago, he texted me to stop by and see him at Splash.  I wish I would have gone to see his smile. My heart goes out to Xac and the rest of his tribe.

Today has not been a good day.  My friend and reader Don Skiff had to face the confessed murderers of his son Donnie, who pleaded "not-guilty" and are playing the court circus for all its worth.

JD Salinger died today, too.  Pause here for the Holden Caulfield metaphor I'm not going through with.

Suffice it to say, I hope to find a way to remember my friend.  All those who knew Anthony sparkle a little brighter today because of him.
Rest in Peace.

14 comments:

youyong said...

Today is my birthday, too, and there is so much personal sadness for you. He looks like a great guy: handsome and personable. Again, somebody who was so worth knowing that I missed out on. When sad things like that happen, it reminds me to get out and meet people and enjoy life.
Bob

Kenneth Walsh said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. He was definitely a bright and friendly face around the neighborhood. :-(

Margret said...

This is just so sad. I barely have words. Sending love.

Anonymous said...

Anthony was my best friend in high school. We listened to phish and drove around in my volvo. He was gorgeous. And he was kind. I am so sad about this. If you have any information, about the funeral or what happened, please let me know. I am so confused and saddened.

i.heart.hairbands@gmail.com

carmel said...

oh, jesse, i'm so sad for your loss... sounds like it was a hard day for a lot of people... big hugs, mate...

Elisa said...

I'm so sorry for you and your friends. It's terrible when you loose someone so young, there is always the regret to not have had enough time to share life. Big hugs, Elisa

AJ said...

Sorry to read of your loss.

Anonymous said...

Anthony was so sweet and funny. When I was coming back to NYC, after living in SoBe, he was always there to help me get settled and back in the flow of NYC.
I am without words at the moment, as I have just learned of this 5 min ago. All I know is I will miss him, so much!

Tommyboi said...

A truly exceptional guy with so much charisma! I love Anthony and I will truly miss his warm eye's and bright smile. I will never forget our crazy weekends, long talks on the phone, and lunches in the city. Where we talked about guys and future ambitions. I always knew Anthony would be successful, and using the measure of how many people are devastated by this tragic loss I know he was. I send his family and friends my deepest condolences, and ask the Lord to give them strength during their darkest hour. Rest in peace my dear friend.

Jesse Archer said...

Thanks all. There is a celebration of Anthony's life this Sunday at ELMO, from 4 - 8 pm. For more info:
http://www.facebook.com/search/?q=Anthony+Valente&init=quick#/event.php?eid=276510971679&ref=mf

xoxo

Anonymous said...

I have known Anthony since we were freshman in highschool we were the best of friends he is so amazing with a heart of gold over the years we lost touch and yet I have lost a piece of my heart I was the lesbian in denial and he was in the closet we vowed that we were gonna take each others virginity lol

When things were bad at his house I was his rock and visa versa it kills me to know that he is gone if you could please keep me informed as to what had happened and what not it would be greatly appreciated and by the way thank you and I love you for loving him he was also lucky to have a friend like you. Tami XO.

Love said...

Anthony was an amazing friend ,no one ever had a brighter smile or a more mischivieous grin,he could always make you laugh and he'd never let you down.A piece of my heart has died with you my old friend.May you be rushed to perfect bliss upon angels wings and never know another moment of earthbound sadness.My heart goes out to Xac and their families.
~L

Love said...

Anthony was unbelievably gorgeous inside and out,his heart was tremendous and he never let you down as a friend,he was a beutiful,bright man full of light and he will be greatly missed by all who knew him.~L

my heart and prayers go out to his partner Xac and both of their families

Anonymous said...

This is still upsetting to me, thank you for posting the amazing photos which comfort me when I need my Anthony fix!