Saturday, March 14, 2009

Help me with a title?

Are you game for a little audience participation!?

I've written a script about the last fag hag. Here's a promo synopsis I wrote up:

She’s New York City’s most fabulous fruit fly! At nearly 40, Audrey Hanson is the racy, fun-loving belle of the ball. She spends her nights as royalty, but when the party ends she always heads home alone.

In the fast pace of high fashion PR, her co-worker Tyler tells her to seek out a straight male version of herself -- the mythical fag stag. But glamorous guru Salome gives her other advice. To nab a man, she insists, Audrey must abandon her gay boys.

When Audrey arrives home from yet another disastrous date to find her roommate has organized a gay sex party in her bedroom, she decides Salome is right. In order to get a man of her own, the last of the fag hags strikes out on a hilarious quest to change the woman she is. Chasing love and lust at all costs, Audrey may find them in the most unlikely of places.

So yeah---long story short: she discovers that you don't need to change who you are to get what you want. The film naturally is totally raunchy and spirited and all about the gay boys too, and let me tell you I put these characters through the wringer!!!

Ok, here's where you come in....I need help with a title! Initially, I wanted to call it "A Hag, her Fags, and a Stag" because that's what it is about, but nobody liked that title. Then I wanted to call it "Hag on the Run" because that just cracks me up. Again, few people liked it and I'm told that the word "Hag" is just a turn-off in the title.

Friends suggest something with "Fruit Fly". Perhaps..... Bye, Bye, Fruit Fly? The Last Fruit Fly? Fruit Fly Forever? Flight of the Fruit Fly?

Strange Fruit Fly?

Among Peacocks?

Island of Misfits?

Manhattan Misfits?


Do any of these stand out to you, dear readers? Or can you make a totally new and fabulously sparkling suggestion of your own?


Enchantra Wayne said...

"My Crown for a Prince", How a party girl begins her search for an unconditional fan.

Jesse Archer said...

love it!

Edina said...

This so reminds me of my 40'ish lady designer friend. Recently she posted on FB that for a str8 woman "working in Fashion is like joining a Convent."

I do like "Hag on the Run", but "Fag Hags" hate to be called that so one doesn't want to alienate a big chunk of one's target audience. A certain Swedish ex-pornstar and now man-about-town wrote a memoir in Swedish called "Bananflugornas herre", which translates to "Lord of The Fruit Flies". I was going the convent route, with something like "A Dash For The Convent Wall." But on reflection the analogy is too obtuse.

"Bye Bye, Fruit Fly" is really terrific I think. It's funny, but softer, shows more empathy, for a heroine who is both funny and a little bit tragic.

If I have any other thoughts will send ya.


Anonymous said...


I hope the beloved character Luke, of "Slutty Summer" and "A Four Letter Word" fame, reappears in your script!

Your Friend Jimmy

Jesse said...

Thanks, guys! Jimmy...YES. Many more details to follow...very soon!

Casper said...

I'm leaning towards "Manhattan Misfits" or "Fruitfly Forever". I'm thinking "Fruitfly Forever" might be better cause it is less generic. And "Hag on the Run" can be the tagline...

Anonymous said...

I'm with Edina for "Bye Bye Fruit Fly" for the same reasons!

Anonymous said...

?Misfits? of course. it is the story of how we and our friends fit together over time . . . and the funny misfits that occur.


Clake76 said...

Mistress of the Flies: From 'Miss Thang' to Mrs.'

Anonymous said...

Honey Trap or Flies On Shit

Anonymous said...

She Done Them Wrong! (?)


Calen said...

After reading everyone elses, these came to me:

Queen of the Flies

They Done Her Wrong

In Pursuit of a Stag {on the Island of Misfits}


The Pursuit of a Stag {on the Island of Misfits}

Good luck :)

Casper said...

"Queen of the flies"??? The gays are the fruit. She is the fly. Hence fruit fly! Maybe "Queen of the Fruit"?

Anonymous said...

Miss Fits


Anonymous said...

Stag Hunt?

Edina said...

Misfits is an anagram of Mis Fist, Mi Fists, and Fists Mi.

Calen said...

I meant "Queen of the Flies" as she is Queen of all the fag hags - the biggest one.

Casper said...

Ok I guess I can see that Calen :) I still like Frutifly forever though or maybe Bye bye Fruitfly or just The Fruitfly... Anyone agreeing with me that those are the best titles?

Edina said...

I love all those Casper, but Fruit Fly is her current status, which she's trying to escape from, before the warranty expires on her biological clock.

So something that expresses motion, or a desire to move to another state, the Hag on the Run,
Bye Bye Fruit Fly-Hello Dragon Fly kind of thing. Or the Queen of The Flies...[insert verb here].

Fly/Flies are words that work on many levels, in that they derive from Barfly (gay alki's), Butterfly (euphemism for v*gina), Fruits, that Swedish book etc. I do prefer Fly to Flies as Flies suggests Flies around a Cow's Ass, Flies on Shite, Flies on Dog Poo on 8th Ave etc. But that's just me.

Oh this is fun. Witnessing the creative process up close!

Edina said...

Flight of The Passion Fruit.

Calen said...

I should have been more specific, lol


Fruit Fly Expiration

The Expiring Fruit Fly

Fruit Fly Takes Flight

I do have some bad news though, i typed in Fruit Fly and this came up:

Apparently someone already made a movie called Fruit Fly :(

{And if Casper, is indeed Casper Andreas, I must tell you I ADORE your movies - your collaboration with Jesse in "A Four Letter Word" is perfection - best gay comedy i've seen yet - thank you both for the infinite amount of quotable lines}

stephen said...

I grew up with old school where the term "fag hag" was a term of endearment.. given only to those chosen few.. but in consideration of today.. and we don't want anything offensive..... I like "Audrey, a Fairy Princess" and this was Paul's idea...

Edina said...

Calen, I tried "Bye Bye Butterfly" and I got > 30,000 hits


PS our host has been very quiet, so I'm guessing he really wants something Hag-ish.

Jesse Archer said...

oh I'm following along! Thanks for participating in the creative process!

Anonymous said...

fairy tales . . .

although i like just ?misfits?

Michael Coates said...

I love "Miss Fits", and "They Done Her Wrong".

I also agree that the words fag, and hag are a bit off putting for a title.

I loved in one of the last issues of OUT the older sister from Ugly Betty referred to herself as a "Fairy Princess". Some one else above mentioned this too. Not sure if that could work in the title too.

Also, I have to admit I find fruit fly a bit strange to be used in a title. I get it, but I just don't know if "fly" the most attractive name for the character type.

Anonymous said...

Hmm, not sure how you'll like these but I went to the queen of all fag hags for inspiration.

The Voyage of Judy Garland

Dorothy's New Friends

Dorothy After Oz

Dorothy on the Other Side of the Rainbow.


Anonymous said...

Queen of the Flies sounds like the novel Lord of the flies. So dont do that one. "Hag" is definately out of the title. Sorry! Island of Misfits sounds like a Christmas movie. and I thought you didnt like the word fruit. I like "My Crown for a Prince". That title sounds better.

Anonymous said...

"Colors of the Rainbow" It reminds me of Colors of the wind and the movie Color of Friendship.

Anonymous said...

How about "The Gay Divorcee" It has a fun play on the word gay, when it used to be "happy" but would be totally different in this sense...

Jim said...

I know I am late reading this, and putting in my two and a half cents (inflation). How about "Alone Among Boys" or "Trapped In A Boys Club" or "A Rose Surrounded by Fruit Flies" or "I'm A Flower, Where's My Bee"

Anonymous said...

I have one more suggestion--"True"--as in 'be true to yourself'. I tried to be a little more creative with that phrase but "True" seems to have some power to it.

One other suggestion, I really like that in your other films the title is a tag line that gets repeated throughout the film. Do you have something like that in this script?

Mark in DE said...

"All the Wrong Places", referring to how fag hags have no men because they hang out in gay bars and/or with gay men.

Margret Echeverria said...

Who says Fag Hags hate to be called Fag Hags? I really don't get that. I've been a Fag Hag for 20 years. And if my years as a totally hooked up straight gal, disqualify me from Fag Hagdom, then I was a Fag Hag for more than 16 years. Being a Fag Hag was a source of pride for me and the most fun way to survive being single. Straight guys came and went for years; but I could always count on my gay boys to wipe away my smudged mascara and crank up the party. I say, be bold and call the film "Fag Hag." This story has never been told properly on celluloid before and once it's been told , all the Fag Hags of the world will walk a little prouder and Fag Hag won't a shameful term to anyone anymore.