Thursday, October 09, 2008

Cold Cock, er, Calling...

This is the last post today. Promise!

Last Sunday Afternoon:

I decided I couldn't sit on my butt in Manhattan this year and do nothing about the election. So when Daniel Nardicio set up the "Barack the Vote" party in Brooklyn to cold call voters in swing states....I had to go. He managed to entice a whole bunch of hipsters to turn Sugarland into a call center by promising go-gos, and show-breaks featuring the talents of Bridget Everett and drag darling Epiphany.

Our job was to use our cell phones to cold-call voters in the swing states on behalf of Moveon.org, and Barack Obama. I don't get intimidated by a lot. But I was terrified to do this: my hand on the phone, my voice, everything was trembling in terror. I'm not sure why. I think because first of all, I hate receiving calls like that. Second, I didn't know what kind of rude ignorance I was going to encounter.

Brian, the editor of Next Magazine, held my arm in support as I got my lists and began calling people with names like Brandolyn and Theodesia in swing states like Virginia. When they answered, I was so flustered I totally fell off script. I couldn't read, I couldn't speak. I looked around and drag queens were giving hand jobs. I was mighty distracted.

Mercifully, the tactic (or is that a strategy?) worked because basically, since I was so shaken, people stayed on the phone with me...out of pity!

Ring, Ring, Ring:

Hello?

(voice quaking) Hello, Brandolyn?

Yes

Hi Brandolyn, my name is Jesse, and I'm calling on behalf. Obama. Vote. Help me, help him. Swing states. Changing the world. Need your President. Please, you...

I'm listening.

Thank you. Brandolyn, you would not believe what's going on in this call center!!!

The ever-lovely Epiphany HARD at work. In the background, I cold call voters.
Photo documentation by WilsonModels

4 comments:

Edina Monsoon said...

Is that Sarah Palin blowing Barack Obama?

The Blackout Blog said...

My mouth is dropped wider than that drag queen's. Glad you made this last post. I'm gonna click back to that picture and hope nobody walks by my cube.

Z said...

nice cock!!1

Mark in DE said...

Only in New York!

Mark :-)