Thursday, July 19, 2007

OUT August issue

The OUT magazine August issue has hit subscribers. This one talks about the roving sex party where I met Bam when we both worked as "Ringers." In the gay world, there are no rules to how you can meet a mate. I write, in part:

Mother may have advised that the only way to find a loving, long-lasting relationship is to meet your mate at the proper place. At the sock-hop, walking the dog, shopping for tater-tots at Ralph’s. Poppycock. If this worked for you, congratulations, but one time this guy cruised me at the supermarket and it totally creeped me out.

Gays don’t maintain conventional relationships, so we should be reluctant to apply conventional guidelines. As far as compatibility goes, I prefer to see your birthday suit before your grocery list. But that's just me.

Readers have written me with their own testimonials about meeting a great mate at a sex club, a strip bar, or as a hustler. It's nice to see I'm not alone. This piece almost didn't run. At first they wanted it toned down (we have to appeal to the romantics, too, you know). So I toned it down. Then they toned it down. And it was still nearly too raunchy to print. Hats' off to the editor for running it. Read the full column here.

Several of you would like to know how to find the roving sex parties I mention. 1) You have to live in NYC and 2) You can't be a troll (there's a discretionary door policy --not my policy, not my party). The next one is at the end of this month. For more details and information, contact Mike at Tell him Jesseonthebrink sent ya. You slut!

Yes, post "7-minute itch" we're still together, Bam and me.

It's difficult to say which of us is more beautiful.


jason said...

what's a "ringer?"

Michael said...

I met my last bf at a rest area. We were together for 3 yrs. Actually I met my best friend at the same rest area and we've been friends for almost 20 yrs.

Bob said...

1st boyfriend - he picked me up hitchhiking. Thanks for the ride, Chris!

1st lover - we met at the dirty book store (so much nicer than an adult book store) next to Lefty's in Ft. Lauderdale (really dating myself - actually I'm single so I am dating myself). We were together 3 years. Should have been a 1 night stand.

2nd lover - we met at Holiday Park in Ft. Lauderdale. A wonderful bleached blond 22 year old - I was 36. We were together 7 years. Now he's 40 and & legally married to a 21 year old guy in Britain.

3rd lover - aaahhh, Thinker's sex club in Ft. Lauderdale. He was wearing blond hair and black boots. A 5 year ride in more ways than one.

Pitbullshark said...

Oh dear, I've just discovered your blog and have hardly gotten past my first entry when I see you've already used the word "troll" as if there's no difference between you and them (in my book, it's the new "n" word, but most won't catch onto it until too late, which is when it is applied to them). It's only a matter of years (fewer than you seem to think), unless you choose to avoid it the way so many in my own generation did. If you don't understand what I am talking about, it would do you some good to think about it.

lwando said...

Fuck this! I a moving to New York!

yet another black guy said...

yeah, what is a 'ringer'? and i just saw Slutty Summer, way funny!

Anonymous said...

ringer is hotties that bring in the crowds to the sex party. makes you think they are all ripped and gorgeous.

Anonymous said...

well bob sounds like you have had a steady stream of real quality guys. I guess jessie is right, you can find love even at a rest stop, phone booth wherever..sounds like you had some really "meaningful" relationships..sheesh, makes all of us look like over sexed, drunken, drug using disease spreading freaks..nice, publish more crap like that Jessie, it helps all of us.

Jesse Archer said...

Will do, doll.

Scott said...

Hey Jesse

well done on the article i think you gave a fair portrayal of the diversity in our community. As you said in your article monogamy isnt for everyone. Keep the contraversy going i like the discussion that arise from your writing. By the way how is your screenplay coming along?


Bob said...

Hi anonymous #2,
Thanks for the judgment. I seem to have struck a chord. What would you have for us when we're called to our table,"Bitter, party of one" or "Boring, party of two?" Bye sweets.

Anonymous said...

some gay people do have "conventional" relationships and recognize the value of monogamy, which involves having some self restraint and committing to another person.

having said that, i'm 21. i'm from the next generation. i can't wait until you self-loathing fags die out. you don't believe that you could possibly deserve a loving, intimate relationship. or perhaps you're too dead inside to possibly commit to one. nonetheless, the newer generation is going to fight for gay marriage... by the time civil unions are the norm for same sex couples, you'll all be even more bitter, aging with wilting bodies, and most importantly... alone.

But at least you'll still have those two-hundred notches on your bedpost, right?